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Met Gala Proves Celebrities Are Turning into Pointless And Silly … Besides For Jack Harlow

The Met Gala 2023 befell Monday, which is the weirdest day of the week to throw a celebration, in response to everybody however Vogue’s Anna Wintour.

The theme for this yr’s present was “Karl Lagerfeld: A Line Of Magnificence,” and whereas there have been some fairly bizarre moments, it appeared like one of the boring years within the present’s historical past. One would hope that — in having a controversial determine because the theme — issues would get attention-grabbing, however it was really only a good illustration of how rapidly a celeb’s mild fades.

Doja Cat: A Line Of WTF

Apparently this outfit is a few reference to Lagerfeld’s cat. My solely query is: who advised her this can be a good thought, and when is that this particular person going to be fired? The entire objective of the Met Gala is to get folks to take a look at you, and this outfit does the other. It’s so creepy, and didn’t move the task.

Jared Leto: A Line Of Genius …?

In harsh juxtaposition to Doja Cat’s horror, Leto confirmed up in full cat costume, additionally impressed by Lagerfeld’s beloved pet. Contemplating how bizarre and creepy Leto is in actual life, this costume is definitely actually endearing and enjoyable. It additionally flies within the face of what the Met Gala is supposed to be, and I simply love that.

Unhealthy Bunny: A Line Of Yawn

I’m going to present Unhealthy Bunny as a lot consideration as he gave his outfit this yr. None. Boring.

Lil Nas X: A Line Of Disgusting

Lil Nas X, who appears to solely exist to present everybody the ick, confirmed up on Monday sporting silver physique paint, a silver thong, and what seems to be Claire’s Equipment stick-on diamonds. I apologize for having to embed this image, but when I’ve to see it, so do you.

Jack Harlow: A Line Of (Alleged) BRILLIANCE!

Harlow avoiding the press by claiming to be on shrooms is presumably probably the most millennial factor I’ve ever heard in my total life! This rumor is in response to NME, however I’m praying that it’s true. As a fellow millennial, I fully get why you’d need to do hallucinogens to go to one thing just like the Met Gala.

And it jogs my memory of that point the fellows from South Park went to the Oscars on LSD, which was additionally superb. (RELATED: Nothing Says Finish Stage Dystopian Nightmare Like The Masked Servant Class Stooping Over To Regulate Hillary Clinton’s Robe On The Pink Carpet)

I additionally don’t understand how anybody can abdomen such a disgusting show of obnoxious nouveau riche whereas sober, particularly these of us who know what actual America is like. It’s fairly onerous to present a crap about movie star garments when a packet of chips is $6 proper now.

My hope is that the extra the mainstream company media reveals itself to be a puppet for mental, financial, and governmental oligarchs, the much less folks will care about something they are saying. If this yr’s present is something to go by, it actually seems like we’re lastly seeing the sunshine … and never from any of these Hollywood stars.